Tag Archives: feelings

When You Are In Love

October 4, 2015 Ramu Das 6 Comments

True love is hard to find. Once found, there is nothing like it – it is complete bliss! Love makes the world go round, don’t you know.

To a lover, in the beginning, – yes, I will be talking only about the beginning stage of love, for, you see, gracious reader, I am a beginner myself – no one in the world seems as important as his/her lover. When you find your special one, friends’ friendship does not remain as strong as it were before; brothers, sisters, fathers and mothers, relatives seem, all of sudden, secondary. Lovers’ love becomes the top-notch objective; lovers’ interest comes before anybody else’s.

It may seem strange to others, as it once seemed to me, how lovers often confine their worlds around each other; how upon the slightest utterance of one lover’s name the other brightens up, becomes somewhat restless, blushes. The way one lover takes care of the other, it seems to a lover, no other can do. The loverly love is divine (or so, a lover finds).

Everything to a third person may seem ridiculous, but only a lover knows love’s power. You must fall in love to know this, this peculiarity of lovers; what feelings/thoughts one lover evokes in the other.

Newly in love – my love, I ought to say, is true to the core – I feel elated and excited. I could not have gotten any other person as good as the person I have found. I love her for what she is, and she reciprocates. The woman I am in love with is the woman I am going to marry. I am not married yet, you see, neither is she married (you may verify this bit of information if you like, ha-ha!), so I believe we were destined to know each other; now I have come too far and I cannot think of not marrying her, and, of course, I cannot allow my mind, not even remotely, to think she would not be mine. Love is ours, and our solid emotional investment must bear fruit (veterans, don’t discourage me by some stupid funny quotes like this one: “A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he’s finished.”). Our relationship is going great. In most of my waking hours I think of her, and, she tells me, she does the same. I feel lucky to be in love with her. She is, in more ways than one, better than me. But we don’t really make any comparisons. Our love is unconditional. Love makes a person humble. We stop being headstrong and learn to compromise wherever necessary. We crack silly jokes and laugh at them too. In short, I am happy with the way things are going; I am happy with my love life. I have learnt to be selfless, and now I am more concerned about her happiness than mine. I know if she is happy I will be happy.

More often than not, lovers are possessive about each other. My roommate often quarrels with his girlfriend (lover). They have a long-distance relationship; he stays in west side of the country and she in the northeast. They call up each other every day and speak for hours and hours. With them every petty issue slowly turns in to a major problem, and, when helpless, my roommate comes to me for advice and suggestions as though I am a love guru or something of that sort. Just the other day he had a long argument with his girlfriend. In the morning, he sent her some messages on WhatsApp and although she saw his messages but he got no reply from her. He saw her online and yet she did not respond to his messages. He was enraged at this. He called her up, her phone was busy; she was talking with someone, but who? At this thought he was further enraged. Every now and then when he comes to me with his complaints I try to console him as much as possible. Earlier, when I was not in love, I used to find this outburst of emotions unreasonable and superfluous. Now that I am in love I know this outburst of emotions is reasonable and genuine.

If you are not in love you would not know what feelings lovers have, why they are possessive about each other, why they act and react the way they do. You would know this and more when you are in love!

I like this song and I dedicate this song to my love, my dear Moon (by the way, Moon is her name), and to all other lovers like me:

VIEWS AND OPINIONS

Who Wants To Be Happy?

May 26, 2014 Ramu Das 10 Comments

Let’s admit it, everyone wants to be happy. And there are different ways by which we can be happy. For instance, someone can be a Superman to be happy, and if you want to be super-duper happy you can be Rajnikant.

All right, let’s get serious, what I want to talk about is, how do you become happy by being you. And is it at all possible for you to be happy by being you?

It is, absolutely it is, take my word for it. You can be a lonely person and yet be happy. You may not have all the riches in the world and yet be happy. You may have just 300 followers on this blog and still you can be as happier as someone who has 50,000 followers. Now, there are people who have everything but are unhappy, so they seek ways to attain happiness and end their miseries.

So, happiness is a state of our mind that can be influenced by our environment; likewise our mind can influence the environment so that we can be happy. A flower though beautiful today will ultimately fade, so does happiness and so does sadness. But when the flower blooms does it not bring a glow to our faces? Does it not give us pleasure? And when it fades, does it not sadden us? When we accomplish something that we have been meaning to, it gives us immense joy, on the other hand failure makes us cry. Happiness and sadness are but momentary feelings.

By our very nature we cannot be happy all the time; neither can we be sad all the time; the universe is designed in such a way, and how often our emotions fluctuate, we cannot do anything about it.

I think there are a few criteria that we have to follow to be happy (and I am saying this from my own experience).

Be in the right place: yes, this is very important. We can only be unhappy by being somewhere we are compelled to be. We have to break free from all compulsions and settle down in a surrounding suitable for us, a friendly atmosphere, so to say.
The second thing that matters are the people you are with. Keep away from those who are the reason for your sadness. This is a vast world; you can definitely find someone who would share genuine sympathetic understanding with you.
As long as we derive happiness by doing something, no matter how tiny it may be, we should keep on doing it (if you become happy by killing someone, I beg you, abandon such a source of happiness!).

All right, so that’s all I have to say. The three points sum up everything I guess, but surely there can be many more factors that we have to keep in mind to be happy. To be happy or not to be happy then becomes a question of whether you really want to be happy or not.